3 Questions For Anyone Struggling After a Cancer Diagnosis

A cancerversary should be a happy time, right? Not necessarily. Life after cancer is full of ups and downs, and that’s ok. As human beings we can’t be expected to be happy all of the time, but in those low times it’s important to make healthy choices for ourselves.

As I approached this milestone of my cancerversary, I looked back over the years and collected my thoughts on what I learned and how cancer affected me in the aftermath.

After each calendar year 'cancerversary’ I would visualize myself meeting the next one and the one thereafter, and so on until I hit the five-year-mark milestone. It served as my own personal validation and a viable goal to reach. I rewarded myself for living a well-lived, well-loved life. I had gained a much greater perspective with an increased and heightened level of self-awareness. I hold a deeper reverence for living in the here-and-now. I try to value and truly appreciate all that life presents.

I now choose to spend my mental and emotional energy on making wiser choices for my future. I alone decide what is the most significant to focus on and try my best to not dwell on insignificant things in the scheme of life. Some decisions matter and some are inconsequential. I stop myself and utilize a quick reminder of a mental exercise I found in the same-titled book, 10-10-10 by Suzy Welch.

It's simple. Each time you find yourself in a situation where there appears to be no easy solution that will make yourself happy, you ask yourself these three powerful questions:

What are the consequences of my decision…

1. In the next 10 minutes?

2. In the next 10 months?

3. In the next 10 years?

It is a great way to 'check -in' with yourself. The three questions will assist you to not only to make the most thoughtful move for yourself but also give you a way to explain your choice to those impacted by your decision making. When you feel yourself stuck, the use of these profound questions/answers and the uncertainty about what to do next will help you transform any uneasiness into a much clearer perspective.

I am humbled by the fact that I made it. I am here…alive and thriving. I have found myself to be much more hyper-sensitized whenever I would hear news that someone either I personally know or someone famous had died from this disease. Going forward, I feel I will always be that way and that is okay.

I really think those of us who have survived now must thrive to honor those who weren't as fortunate as us. Keep them alive in our memories and our dedication to helping others.

Cancer may have taken away a lot of our physical health but it has served to reveal a lot about who we are, our personal integrity and our innermost character. It teaches us that we have to face our deepest fears head on and be selflessly courageous. Becoming a better self is about our own personal truths that may have been overlooked before. Perhaps those issues may have needed to be released, changed or owned to become the new and improved you!

Do you have any methods for keeping yourself on track either during or after cancer treatment? Answer in the comments below or sign up here.

Photo courtesy of Meiying Ng.